Throughout the summer, I felt pressure from others to save my marriage, but it takes two to make it work, and one of us had already started making plans with someone else. Silence filled the spaces between necessary conversations, and I felt lost. However, the song "Carry Me On" by Tom Andrews became a guiding anthem as my true friends rejoined my life, reminding me that I wasn't alone in my struggles. The lyrics spoke to my longing for support and companionship during such a challenging time. "Phantom and Vapors" provided silent strength during my weakest moments, encapsulating the feeling of having someone quietly rooting for me even when I felt like I was drowning.
As I waded through this turbulent sea of emotions, "My Better Me" by Lord of the Lost resonated with the painful truth that we had become toxic to each other, despite our best intentions. The song's raw honesty helped me confront the reality of my situation, allowing me to acknowledge that the love we once shared had turned into a slow poison that had seeped into our relationship. Letting go of that toxic bond opened up a void, but it also allowed me to shed the demands of being a wife and reclaim my identity.
In the midst of this upheaval, I began to feel a flicker of light in the darkness of my heart. As I relocated and started a new chapter, I found myself reconnecting with loyal friends from the past. Their unwavering support reignited a sense of belonging I had longed for, reminding me that I am not defined by my struggles but rather by the connections I nurture. I became open to welcoming new people into my life, eager to share this part of my journey with those who resonate with my newfound spirit.
Phantom and Vapor encouraged me to reconnect with my authentic self, free from the constraints of others' perceptions. The haunting melodies and introspective lyrics reminded me that vulnerability could be a source of strength. The song "There'll Come a Day" by The Letter Black also found its way into my rotation, offering a beacon of hope that brighter days are ahead. Its uplifting message helped me to envision a future filled with possibilities, even when I felt overwhelmed by despair.
Even from a distance, my friends were my lifeline, providing support through video calls and texts, acting as an IV to nourish my mind and soul during the darkest moments of letting go. The song "For Every Step" by Dead by April became an anthem for us, reminding me that those who truly belong in my life will always hold a special place in my heart. Its themes of loyalty and resilience resonated deeply, reinforcing the idea that I wasn't alone in this journey.
At the beginning of the year, I felt a strong connection to Tosha Lynn’s music, especially "Walking Alone." Its poignant lyrics perfectly captured the isolation I felt during those dark days. But as the year came to a close, preparing to move forward and embrace the future, "Ready to Fall" by Chris Wallace began to resonate with me more intensely. The song's message of embracing change and the unknown became a powerful mantra, igniting a sense of excitement within me.
While I started this year feeling hopeless and lost, I am ending it with a newfound sense of hope. The emotional value of these songs has been immeasurable, acting as both a mirror to my pain and a lighthouse guiding me toward healing. Each lyric, each melody, has woven itself into the fabric of my journey, reminding me that even in the darkest moments, there is always a flicker of light waiting to be reignited. Music has been my companion, reflecting my struggles and helping me celebrate my victories, no matter how small.
As I prepare to embrace whatever the future holds, I feel a sense of excitement bubbling within me. I am ready to explore new possibilities and forge connections with those who enter this chapter of my life. With the loyal friends from my past by my side and an open heart for new relationships, I stand at the threshold of a fresh beginning, eager to discover what lies ahead. Each day feels like an opportunity for growth and renewal, and I am filled with gratitude for the lessons learned and the strength I've gained. I know that I have the resilience and support to navigate this new chapter, and I am ready to step forward with hope lighting my way.
Other noted songs of 2018 for me were:
> Heart Attack by Trey Songz
>Tomorrow Never Comes by VNV Nation
>Drive Him Home by Anna Nalick
>Mirrored Image by Tosha Lynn
>Burning by EMD
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